Love is such a crazy thing.

Love just drives me crazy. It always breaks my heart. I am in love with my best friend, a woman that is so wonderful in so many ways, but who could never think of my as anything but her best friend and confidant. I know everything about her, including some intimate details that few if any are allowed to know. Yet, she never have the same feelings. I’ve come to realize that love can be such a complex creature that I envy those who have a easier time with it. I’ve learned that confession is not good for the soul either. Where one time my friend would trust me to be nude before me and allow me to take pictures of her, now I fear that she never think of doing that again, now that she knows how I feel. While we still friends, I doubt we will ever be the same, maybe I should have kept my feelings and mouth shut. I’ve made the biggest screwup with her by telling her. I know this, even if she still says we are friends. I know she may never trust me as before. Before, she would have trusted maybe even sleeping in the same bed with me, knowing I would not do anything that she didn’t wanted, now she might be afraid of doing so. Although I not changed and will always be a person of my word, of my heart and my honor. I know it will never be the same. I was stupid, I confessed my heart and know now that was probably the worse thing I could have done.